Chapter 67

 9 – Marianne’s Truth – 6

 

Through my conversation with Ruby, I pondered whether I should distance myself from Ilya after all, and waited for time to pass.

I spent a gloomy time wondering if this is what it feels like to be a criminal waiting for things to cool down.

And then...

 

The turning point came in the spring when I was sixteen.

One day, Ruby suddenly appeared at our house.

Needless to say, it was extremely impolite for a viscount's daughter to visit an earl's household without any prior notice. Normally, one would first send a letter or a messenger to ask for permission to visit.

But she didn't do that.

While Ruby behaves as if family ties didn’t matter at the academy, the moment she steps outside the school grounds, she follows the customs of aristocratic society. If she meets someone in town, she always starts with a greeting and never fails to show respect.

That's precisely why she became such a trustworthy friend. It was only natural that I was somewhat taken aback by her unexpected behavior.

 

“I apologize for my impoliteness, Lady Marianne.”

 

The girl led into the reception room was dressed very simply. Looking at her feet, I noticed she was wearing boots. The dirty toes made me tilt my head in confusion at how different she looked from usual.

What made me feel even more uneasy was the imposing knight towering behind Ruby. He was probably a bodyguard, but he seemed somewhat different from the knights our family usually employed. This man surely wasn't a knight meant to protect someone.

His undeniable presence suggested he was a knight meant to take up his sword and fight in unforeseen circumstances.

 

“I don't have much time so...”

 

Her cheeks were devoid of color, and her expression vas stiff and rigid. I loved her round, softly rosy cheeks, but she seemed to have lost weight without me noticing.

“Ruby?”

I called her name, but couldn't find the words. I didn't know what to ask. Everything about my friend in front of me was different than usual. Did her tightly tied-up hair have some significance?

I gestured for her to sit on the sofa, and she glanced at her guard before sitting down hesitantly.

It seemed strange that she was so wary of her own knight guard.

 

“What is wrong?”

I instructed the maid who was standing by to prepare tea, and then sat down at the opposite of my friend.

“Um, actually...”

Her small lips moved as if trying to breathe air. She seemed unable to form the words properly. I couldn't tell if she was in a hurry or panicked, but a light sheen of sweat was beading on her forehead.

She seemed restless, and there was even a sense of urgency, as if she were being chased by someone.

To help her feel a little more at ease, I moved seats and sat down next to her. This way, I could hear her voice more clearly.

“Dismiss everyone.”

When I gave this order to the maid who brought the tea, she replied, “Understood,” and urged Ruby's guards to leave. Perhaps because she has served me for a long time, she understands what I want to do and say without me having to explain everything from A to Z, which is very helpful.

 

“...So? What happened?”

 

I turned back to Ruby once we were alone in the room.

I calmed her down and placed the teacup in her hand. She picked it up with trembling fingers and took a small sip. I watched her silently. The girl sighed, looked up at the sky, and closed her eyes.

After counting one, two seconds, she straightened her posture and slowly opened her eyelids. She looked at me without making a sound. She was about to confide in me about something so important that it required her to prepare herself before telling me.

 

“I have to leave the academy.”

 

In stark contrast to her demeanor just moments before, she spoke in a flat, emotionless tone. Perhaps she had to maintain that composure, or she might have burst into tears. My agitated face was reflected in her red eyes.

“Why?”

My voice, squeezed out, sounded terribly weak. It was a voice I'd never heard before.

Ruby placed the cup she had been holding back on the saucer, and this time with a troubled expression,

“We're getting married,” she said in a single word.

“Married?” I couldn't understand what she meant, so I could only repeat her words.

The air in the room seemed to gain mass, weighing heavily on my back. I felt a chill, so I rubbed my hands together. I was clearly flustered.

 

Leaving the academy to get married.

 

How wonderful it would have been if this had been her own choice.

But it was abundantly clear that this wasn't her own decision. Her exhausted face, showing she'd been crying all night, proved it.

“It seems my future husband isn't feeling well, and he wants to get married as soon as possible... They requested it.”

“...I see.”

“To begin with, I was only allowed to attend the academy thanks to my husband's kindness. So, if he tells me not to attend the academy anymore, I have no choice but to comply.”

Even though they hadn't signed a marriage contract, she was already calling her fiancé “husband.”

The red stone on her left ring finger reflected the sunlight streaming in through the window in a dark way. It was an unusually extravagant piece of jewelry. The reason she had been buying new shoes one after another became clear. It was a gift, probably.

“May I ask what it all means?”

When asked, she nodded and said, “The territory that our family was granted by His Majesty the King...the land itself is barren, and not many crops grow there. Nevertheless, we were able to make a living by selling handicrafts and such. However, due to the recent recession and the soaring cost of raw materials, even that has become difficult. We can no longer make handicrafts at all. And there is nothing to replace them with. ---In short, our family has failed in managing the territory.”

It seemed like a very abridged explanation, but I supposed that's all she could say to an outsider.

“There was someone who offered to help, and as collateral, I was to marry him,” that's what she said.

She said her fiancé was a merchant, so for him, it was probably a marriage to enhance his social standing. Even if he himself wasn't granted a title, his connection to a viscount's daughter would be a powerful backing. Even if the viscount's family was impoverished, the title itself held meaning, and it seems to be quite alluring.

“Such a sacrificial marriage proposal...”

I blurted out what I was thinking and quickly covered my mouth. Ruby widened her eyes slightly and chuckled.

“It's so rare to hear Lady Marianne make such a slip of the tongue, I couldn't help but laugh.”

Then, as if unable to contain herself, she burst out laughing, her eyes softening. I thought it was unusual to see such a relaxed laugh, but then she covered her mouth with both hands as if to hide her smile. With a final sigh, the contours of her eyes slowly softened.

Not a single sound escaped her lips, but her shoulders were trembling.

“Ruby...!”

I called her name, not knowing what to say. She nodded in response, but still seemed to be trying to hold back tears, taking deep breaths.

After a moment, she wiped her eyes and said, “No matter how many times I cry... tears never run dry.”

Yet, tears that she couldn't stop flowed down her cheeks, and she sobbed, “Even if I cry, I can't get back what I've lost.” Then another drop fell, landing on her knees.

 

“We received several offers of financial assistance. Some even offered purely monetary support, saying that we could repay them with interest once our business stabilized.”

Hearing only that, one might readily accept, but something about it seemed suspicious. In fact, she is here precisely because that offer fell through. When pressed for more details, it seemed the offer itself had indeed been dropped. At that time, it appeared that Ruby's fiancé had advised and supported her parents.

“My parents and my husband are old friends. So, I've heard that at first, they simply asked for his advice.”

It seems that somehow, that progressed into talks of a marriage proposal with Ruby.

 

“My parents said I could choose. They said it was up to me to choose whatever I wanted. —That's what they said to me when I was eight.”

I didn't know the Ruby from that time. She must have been just as intelligent as she is now. Smart, clever, and bright. She must have studied hard. Even so...

What could a mere eight-year-old child possibly choose?

“Of course, I said I didn't want to go. Naturally. I never even considered marrying a man older than my father.” But,

“One winter, a cold wave worse than usual struck the territory, causing many deaths. The villagers were starving like never before.” The business had failed, the workers had been lost, and there was nothing to eat. The debt was piling up without limit. The young girls who remained on the territory were being sold into servitude. All she could do was watch as her parents racked their brains trying to come up with a solution.

“That's when I remembered. The marriage proposal with my husband.”

“...”

“I was ten years old.”

My friend, who had lowered her gaze, was no longer crying. Only anguish was visible in the red corners of her eyes, which looked painful to the touch.

“I asked my father and he contacted him, and my husband simply replied that there was nothing to worry about...”

She said he was a very wealthy merchant, so he could save their territory from its predicament. In other words, he was a benefactor to her and her parents. —And yet, it all feels like a setup.

“Please don't say anything, Lady Marianne.”

How much of this was the man's doing? Ruby and her parents must surely have a hunch.

“I've already made my choice.”

Words fail me.

Because I neither have the capacity nor the right to criticize her choice. I also lack the power to save her, her family, their territory, or their people.

 

It's too late now.

“Don't make that face, Lady Marianne.”

It’s too late now, what can I do?

 

“I may look like this, but I'm not pitiful,” Ruby said, straightening her back and picking up the cup with her slender fingers. She took a deep breath through her nose, savoring the taste, and swallowed.

“It's delicious,” she said, narrowing her eyes and basking in the pleasure.

“In the end, I just can't give up this kind of life,” she added. I knew she wasn't being sincere. I also sensed that she was putting on a brave face.

She was to marry a much older, wealthy man, whom she would call “husband,” for the sake of her family. Moreover, he already had two wives and presumably several children. She was filled with anxiety.

However, such things weren't uncommon.

Marriage for the sake of family transactions wasn't limited to women; men sometimes married women they didn't love for the sake of their family's survival and prosperity.

 

There is only one wish, no matter what.

That the person I choose to be my partner is kind.

If only they were, I would believe that I would not be treated unfairly.

 

“Well then, I must go now.”

 

When my friend suddenly stood up, I asked, “Already?”

She replied without hesitation, “We're planning to leave immediately.” It seemed she was in a hurry after all.

The sudden turn of events left me speechless. I hastily stood up, following Ruby, but in my agitation, I bumped my leg on the table. “Oh,” I said, grabbing the hand of the person who caught me.

 

Her fingers were cold.

 

We ended up clinging to each other, gazing into each other's eyes at a distance so close our breaths touched.

“...Lady Marianne,”

“Yes,”

“May I hug you just once?”

“Yes, of course.”

A woman smaller than me gently embraced me, enveloping me in her arms. Soft, yet tight. The perfect balance; I could break free at any moment, yet I felt as if I wanted her to stay like that forever.

I involuntarily blurted out, “Don't go.”

Without hesitation, she shook her head and said, ‘No,’ before letting go, “We've already received the loan. We borrowed it on the premise that I would get married, so I must go. There is no substitute. Money cannot repay this. That's... our agreement.”

“Such... a path with no other option... it's impossible.”

I watched Ruby's wavering eyes.

The thought crossed my mind that perhaps asking my father might solve something. But Ruby’s husband wasn't just any wealthy man. He was a well-known figure in high society, favored by the upper nobility. On the other hand, I'd heard rumors that he was quite forceful in business dealings. He showed no mercy to those who opposed him. He was not someone I could afford to make an enemy of.

Should I put my family in danger for Ruby's sake?

 

I couldn’t.

 

“Lady Marianne.”

“...”

“It's not that I had no choice. We always have two paths. A path where we choose from several options, and a path where we choose nothing. There was a path before me, and I could have chosen nothing. If I had, all I would have had to do was wait for ruin. That would have been easier. But I chose the path of survival,” Ruby said. “So please, I beg you. Now, won't you give me some charity?”

“...Charity?”

“Yes. Please tell me. Telle me that I will definitely be happy.”

 

Ruby used to say my kindness was like charity. She said that because I had something, I could give the surplus to others. But ultimately, that hurt people.

That's why I discipline myself to be careful. It's a social norm that no one should give charity indiscriminately.

Charity should be given only to those who need it.

She's not lacking anything. Yet, she wants charity.

And then, as I was at a loss for words, my only real friend rubbed salt into the wound.

 

“And then, say goodbye. So that we will never meet again.”

 

“I can't,” I replied, but she pressed on, “No, you must.”

That's right. I already know. If we part here, we will never meet again.

I know what kind of family she married into and what kind of person her husband is.

He's a troublesome person.

That's precisely why he's someone we nobles must not underestimate, and we must not approach him carelessly. A young girl like me, with a title but no real power, would be trampled over more easily than twisting a baby's arm.

 

“You will not make a mistake in judgment. Therefore, this is where we part ways.”

 

I pulled her body closer again and hugged her tightly. I heard a sob in my ear.

“Ruby. You will definitely be happy.”

“Yes,”

“Definitely, it will be alright.”

 

Definitely,

 

The words I repeated seemed hollow as they faded towards the ceiling. What I was giving wasn't true kindness. Charity ends once you give. I understood all too well that there was nothing beyond that.

 

****************

 

I always thought I had made the wrong choice.

But...

---The path with choices, and the path of choosing nothing. Which path was I really walking?

 

Ruby taught me.

 

Even choosing nothing is a choice in itself.

 

Chapter 66

Chapter 66

 9 – Marianne’s Truth – 5

 

“Why am I like this...”

 

I muttered to myself, then quietly fell silent. Where do I even begin, and what should I start over?

What should I do, what should I say, to repair my relationship with her? No matter how much I think about it, I can't figure it out.

What if not just one choice, but all of my choices were wrong?

Which choice should I change to guide my life in a better direction?

 

“There's no point in thinking about it.”

 

Ruby, sitting across from me, shook her head slowly and a smile spread across her face.

Several days had passed since that incident. I desperately wanted to talk to Ruby, so I asked her to make time for me, and we arranged to meet in the music room. Since permission from the academy was required to use it, I used the excuse that I was going to practice the piano.  I hadn't told anyone that I was meeting her there.

The reason I chose a different location than usual was because it was soundproof. But it wasn't just a simple conversation.

“...But even so, to think that someone who plays so wonderfully doesn't like the piano very much.”

She had asked to hear the piece I performed at the music appreciation recital again, so I agreed. It was a small price to pay for her listening to me, but if it satisfied her, it was worth it.

And after I played for a few minutes, Ruby showered me with enthusiastic praise.

Her inability to hide her excitement and her flushed cheeks were endearing, and I couldn't help but smile. At the same time, it felt like a sense of mockery, because I found it strange that she was praising a performance that was far from perfect.

Noticing my growing dejection, my friend showered me with even more praise. The applause continued, reminding me of a scene from a time long ago.

A young Ilya, looking unsure of herself yet smiling, sitting in front of the piano. How many people noticed that her fingers were trembling?

 

“Lady Marianne, your charm also lies in your obliviousness to your own overwhelming abilities.”

 

Despite being showered with praise, I couldn't simply accept it at face value—that was inevitable in this world.

In high society, it was quite common to shower someone with excessive flattery, almost to the point of being obsequious, while secretly criticizing them. It was called sarcasm. And it's considered uncouth not to respond to sarcasm with sarcasm. Even within these roundabout exchanges, offensive remarks that provoke jealousy were strictly forbidden, and disrespectful behavior was unacceptable. Moderation was key in everything, and at its core lay a shared understanding of the customs and traditions of aristocratic society.

The ability to discern the other person's true intentions was an extremely important skill.

 

“Ruby, I wonder why you think of me that way.”

 

I murmured, and she averted her gaze for a moment, seemingly lost in thought. Then, as if making up her mind, she turned back to me. She stared at me, sitting on the piano stool with the piano behind me.

 

“In fact, I was going to keep quiet about it. I don't think you remember, but actually, when we were children, we met.”

“...Really?”

I immediately searched the depths of my memory, but I couldn't find any scene that seemed to fit. I prided myself on having a good memory, but on the other hand, I was the type to completely forget things that didn't interest me. Being decisive and not dwelling on the past was partly due to my own nature.

 

The only things I can never forget are the one related to Ilya.

 

“You don't remember, do you?” Ruby said, placing her index finger to her lips, looking somewhat embarrassed. When I asked her about it again...

 

She lowered her eyes, saying it was a very, very long time ago. A large tea party hosted by a viscountess. We had both been brought there by our mothers, and that's how we met by chance.

It's strange that I didn't remember the tea party I was invited to with my mother. No matter how hard I tried to remember, not even a fragment of the memory surfaces.

“It probably wasn't anything special for you, Lady Marianne. For your family, it was a gathering organized by a much lower-ranked family, after all.”

 

“There were several young ladies and young men present, but they were all of the same or lower-ranked family as me, so to me there was no particular difference in social standing. Incidentally, I recall that Lady Ilya was not there.”

Then, Lady Marianne and her mother, who were of considerably higher social standing, appeared.

“Adults and children alike...the servants, everyone was distracted. They were all on high alert, worried that something terrible might happen. I, who had only been invited to the gathering, was no exception,” she said, gazing into the distance as she recalled the time.

“Amidst all this, one of the young ladies said...”

 

Are you wearing someone else's hand-me-downs?

 

“Her eyes were so pure and clear, they were looking straight at me,” she said, lowering her eyebrows. Following her gaze, I noticed her fashionable, gleaming shoes. Had she bought a new pair again?

 

“I was so embarrassed at the time.”

 

I don't know if the girl who spoke to me had any malicious intent. After all, I was so young. There was no way I could have gauged the true intentions of someone I'd just met that day. Maybe she was just voicing a question she was curious about. But I also felt like she was implicitly saying I was out of fashion.

I looked for my mother, unsure how to respond, but she seemed busy chatting with other women. That said, I couldn't interrupt their conversation. I knew that, given my mother’s position, I couldn't afford to make a mistake.

Noticing my gaze, mother simply smiled awkwardly from a distance.

―――――Looking at her from afar, I thought...

My mother's dress was also two years old. I didn't really know, but it probably wasn't very sophisticated.

Now that I think about it, when we arrived at the mansion, I felt like the host and his wife exchanged glances and gave each other twisted smiles. They immediately turned back to us and gave us a polite greeting, so I thought I must have been mistaken.

The reason I didn't bother to check my mother's face was because I was distracted by the splendid venue. It was so meticulously prepared, with so much money and time spent, that I felt intimidated.

However, the hostess's comment, “What a lovely dress,” stuck in my mind. Maybe it was a sarcastic remark.

 

If that were the case, it would be sad.

 

The dress, which was described as a "hand-me-down," was actually prepared by my mother specifically for this tea party. My family couldn't afford to have something newly made, so it wasn't custom-made or tailored to my size. Yet, somehow, she acquired it and gave it to me as a gift.

Looking back now, the reason it was in a box was probably because it had been carefully repackaged as a gift to look brand new.

If it looks like a hand-me-down, it might actually be secondhand.

Even so, the wet nurse who said, “It suits you,” seemed happy. She even had tears in her eyes as she said, “You've grown so big.” The same hands that had tied my hair then adjusted the frills on my skirt. Her aging hands took their time to finish it.

That's why I was looking forward to it.

I even felt a sense of superiority, thinking I would look prettier than anyone else.

But it was completely different.

 

We might look shabby standing next to Lady Ruby.

 

Someone said that, noticing my frozen, unresponsive posture. Then, like a receding tide, everyone around me vanished.

 

This wasn't supposed to happen.

 

When I got off the carriage, my heart was filled with excitement at the thought of potentially making friends.

 

“----,”

 

I squeezed my eyes shut as my vision blurred.

I mustn't cry. What would anyone say if they saw me? I couldn't cause a commotion and tarnish the organizer's reputation. Such criticism would be detrimental to my mother's standing.

At that moment,

 

Those are lovely flowers.

 

A bright voice, like a ray of light shining through the darkness, rang out. I involuntarily looked up, and there stood a girl so beautiful she seemed otherworldly, as if enveloped in light. The tears I had been holding back rolled down my cheeks.

 

I unconsciously held my breath.

 

“That's lovely,” she said, her face turned directly towards me. As I felt bewildered and captivated by her appearance, she continued, "Your hair ornament is very beautiful."

 

Upon closer inspection, it wasn't that she herself was emitting light. It was as if her smooth, combed golden hair was simply shining brightly.

A being from heaven suddenly appeared.

It was Lady Marianne. I was so taken aback I was speechless, but she didn't seem to notice.

“These are real flowers, aren't they?” she said, nodding to herself as if she'd finally understood.

I couldn't even prepare a hair ornament, so I just gathered some flowers that were blooming in the garden and stuck them in. For a moment, I thought she was making fun of me, but then she smiled brightly, and I realized she wasn't being sarcastic.

I was so overwhelmed that I barely managed to say, “Yes, that is correct...” I even forgot to introduce myself.

My heart was beating more violently than ever before. It wasn't exactly that I was happy she noticed my hair ornament.

Before me stood a beauty so stunning that even renowned artists, with their exceptional skills, found it difficult to fully capture.

Her perfect appearance almost gave the impression of being artificial, making me feel intimidated.

Her mother gave the same impression; when they walked together, everyone was captivated, their mouths agape. Being praised so directly by such a child left me at a loss for how to respond.

 

“That dress too,” she said, and just as tension rose in my mind, she deepened her smile and said, “The embroidery is lovely,” causing my body temperature to rise.

My mother had embroidered it to make it a little more beautiful. As I thanked her, I glanced around and saw the children who had left earlier looking at me.

They seemed to be curious about Lady Marianne.

They wanted to get closer to her, but given their social position, they couldn’t approach her unless she approached first. Our social standings were that far apart. They were inexperienced and didn’t know how to proceed.

She showed no interest in them at all, and when she invited me to have some cookies, I felt like I was in heaven. Of course, there was no way I could refuse. So I followed her.

---That said, simply being near her didn't mean we became friends.

After all, Lady Marianne belonged to the first-ranked family among the Count's households.

Leaving aside the children, the adults who couldn't speak to Marianne's mother approached her, trying to win over that child instead. One after another, all sorts of people spoke to her.

 

“In the end, my happiness at being by Lady Marieanne's side only lasted at the beginning,” Ruby chuckled, reminiscing about that time.

Because no one paid any attention to me. They seemed to be watching me, but pretended not to see me.

“But then, there were specific times when they seemed to notice me.”

 

“Lady Marianne is truly adorable. Her smile is lovely, and above all, she's kind. The dress suits her well. She has class.”

“In contrast, the child next to her...”

 

“In short, it seemed my existence only had value as a point of comparison to the noble child Marianne. It was so painful. It felt like I was being slowly strangled.”

A whisper that no one else could hear, yet for some reason, I could hear it clearly, said, “what a pathetic child. Standing beside Lady Marianne is foolish and shameless. It's unbearable to look at.”

 

“I was happy and had expectations on my own... and then I was hurt and disappointed on my own.”

Ruby laughed self-deprecatingly.

“Lady Marianne, I know that you were simply kind, and that you kept me by your side without any ulterior motives, following your heart.” She said to explain that she had no intention of belittling me.

“But the people around us were different. They compared me to you, looked down on me for being inadequate, and mocked me.”

She stood up and stood beside me. Because the chair was small, our whole bodies were close together. She leaned gently on my shoulder, and her soft hair tickled my cheek.

 

“Ruby...?”

“It's not like you did or said anything terrible to me. But I was hurt.”

A soft sigh dissolved into the cold air of the music room and disappeared. Since I couldn’t see her face, I didn't know if she was laughing or crying. Either way, why laugh? Why cry? No matter how much I thought about it, I couldn't understand.

Because I've never felt what she has.

“Lady Marianne's kindness might be like charity. It seems as if you’re giving away what you have. Because you possessed it in excess, you’re giving it to others."

Therefore,

 

“Being near you, Lady Marianne, hurts me.”

 

It sounded like a calm, detached voice.

 

But surely that wasn't because she felt nothing. Rather, there was a stillness to it, as if she was suppressing her emotions. For some reason, the image of Ilya standing there, head bowed, came back to me.

 

Because I was there, she was hurt too.

 

“Then...you probably don't like me, do you?”

 

I didn't want to believe she hated me. Besides, I couldn't imagine her being the kind of cunning woman who would pretend to like me while secretly disliking me.

Nevertheless, I wasn't so naive as to think she liked me after hearing what she'd just said.

 

“No, I do like you! ...Oh, I apologize. I can't believe I said that,” she said, her face bright red, and then she strongly denied it, “Anyway, there's absolutely no way I don't like you!”

Then she suddenly stood up and stood in front of me. She exhaled deeply and knelt down like a knight. The look in her eyes as she looked up at me seemed pleading.

When I tried to get her to stand up because her skirt was getting dirty, she shook her head and stopped me.

“As I said earlier, I got hurt for no reason. It wasn't you who hurt me. The same goes for my disappointment. It wasn't you who I was disappointed in,” she said, gently taking my hand.

“I was disappointed in myself for almost selfishly resenting you for being so kind to me.”

 

Being compared to others, being put down, and being ridiculed for being inadequate—it's painful and sad. It's easy to blame someone else. Living with hatred isn't so difficult in itself.

The difficult part is fulfilling oneself. Filling one's mind with knowledge, filling one's heart with love and kindness, keeping one's mind and body healthy, leaving no openings, and not letting anyone get in.

She spoke at length, as if she were a saint,

“Therefore, I have decided to make an effort. So that if the time comes when I meet Lady Marianne again, I will not be ashamed.”

Even if she could not afford a new dress, she decided to at least cultivate her character so that she could fit in with the upper class.

“If you have a goal, you can work hard. I've always followed your lead,” Ruby declared proudly. “Even when I felt lost, you were there to guide me. That's the reason why I learned the flute. I heard rumors that Lady Marianne was very good at the piano, so I practiced hoping that one day we could play together. Playing a piano duet would have been nice, but I felt like I would only hold you back.” The setting sun streamed into the classroom. Red shadows loomed from the ceiling, and every few seconds, her face became obscured.

 

“...I've strayed from the topic, but what happened with Lady Ilya was unavoidable. Regretting what has happened won't change anything. However, future choices can be changed.”

So please, don't give up. She brought our clasped hands to her foreheads, as if in prayer. The warmth of her body was comforting, and I let out a sigh of relief.

 

“Ruby,”

“Yes,”

“Let's play together someday? I'd love to hear you play the flute.”

 

Her eyes, their irises reflecting light, flickered. She seemed happy, yet there was a slight tension in the smile on her lips. I will never forget that indescribable expression.

 

I was sure that I'd said I wanted to play music with her, and yet...

 

“Yes! Lady Marianne. Someday, surely...”

 

Her voice was excited, but her expression was a stark contrast. I wouldn't understand its meaning until much later.

Twilight enveloped us, and the surroundings grew physically dark. It was only then that I felt my heart regain its richness, imagining a future that hadn't yet arrived.

 

After that, we were never able to play together.

Chapter 65                                           Chapter 67