If this is the real end- 14
You see, people who have given up everything and abandoned all hope,
become skillful at smiling, you know? Crow had said.
Whether it’s joy or sorrow, or even pain, when all emotions are sealed
off in the depths of their hearts, their faces don’t lose their expressions. ……
They smile.
“When nothing can no longer be done and all is helpless, humans who have
“given up” everything will smile, you see.”
The sun had started to set.
Turning her back to the rim of the
window, which had been dyed red by the light, mother took one, two steps towards
me. It was a lady-like way of walking, a way that didn’t produce any sound.
Even at a moment like this, mother didn’t forget her manner as a noble.
I ended up feeling admiration in
front of her excellence, despite the strangeness of the situation.
Her facial features weren’t gaudy,
her back was stretched upright, she was moving with a feminine bearing that
made it hard to take your eyes away from even the tips of her fingers.
She wasn’t a beautiful woman to the
point of being breathtaking, but the refinement of her behavior drew in
people’s eyes. However, for a woman belonging to the nobility, such a thing was
common. The people wearing items of high value, somehow, their attitude and
gestures, and even the way they phrased their words, were different from
others.
This was because from a young age,
the being called a noble would undertake a different education from the common
populace; in the first place their foundations were different.
There probably must have been
trivial differences depending on the person, but they certainly wouldn’t be big
ones. In other words, aristocrats were originally beings who would stand out
even if they didn’t do anything.
Even someone like me was probably
not different in that aspect. Even dressed soberly, I would still appear like
someone from a noble family and I would stand out if I were to walk downtown.
Because both the fabric of the dress
and the way it had been weaved and seamed showed it was made by a dexterous
craftsman, naturally it looked different from a cheap one. The people whose
eyes could discern such a thing were unexpectedly numerous.
Moreover, in most cases, I would be
accompanied by a maid or a butler, and just this would be conspicuous enough to
gather all eyes on me.
However, this would only apply to when
I went downtown. I understood it didn’t represent how I was assessed as a person
myself.
In one of my lives, at the time I
was sold in human traffic, nobody had believed I was a noble. If what I wore,
my hair style and the environment I was placed in were different, in the blink
of an eye, the frame making me a noblewoman would get out of place.
I was such a person. If I was
surrounded by nobles, I would be buried out; that demonstrated that in reality,
I would not remain in anyone’s eyes.
Put in that sense, maybe mother and
I were similar. However, at the same time, it was also a fact there was an
overwhelming difference between us.
If the both of us lined up next to
each other, the one who would be told she was beautiful would probably be
mother. Since we were related by blood, our facial features should have had
some resemblances, yet I was only a mediocre person to the bitter end while
nonetheless, mother was beautiful.
In addition, the atmosphere we
emitted itself was greatly different. Mother simply appeared nothing but
cheerful, gentle and seemed to have an air of composure. That comfortable
atmosphere, which could wrap up around everyone and anyone, was certainly characteristic
of a noble. Anyone would appraise it like this, even I had always thought so.
Even now, she was excessively
composed, she didn’t seem to be shaken at all.
“Ilya, why did you do that?”
On the contrary, her voice was even
calmer than usual.
I promptly diverted my line of
sight, but it was not out of guilt. Because mother was intensely staring
straight at my face, I had simply faltered due to the strength of that gaze.
I wondered if mother was trying to
appeal something to me with that intense gaze.
“They are from... Silvia’s room…”
“Did you take them without
permission?”
When I was hesitating to speak up,
mother uttered so without delay.
“You cannot do this.” You mustn’t do such a thing, she added with
a troubled expression, as if she was complaining to a child.
It wasn’t an angry tone, nor was it
blaming me, it was merely a way of speaking full of fondness and affection, but
that made my heart tremble.
Even when I was a child, she never
talked to me with that kind of tone. Because from the time I became Soleil’s
fiancée, guiding me had been the role of the maids.
And so, in this way, I have never
been warned or reprimanded directly like this. It sounded almost as if we were
a normal pair of mother and daughter.
“If I’m not wrong, these are items
that child cherishes.”
The furniture arranged inside the
room was of splendid textures worthy of the wife of an earl, but there weren’t
many of them. She would dress up when she was invited to an evening party, but
ordinarily she dressed modestly and this room reflected mother’s preference.
Even though there were several vials
on the carpet, the scene looked like an ordinary day when a daughter had come
pay a courtesy visit and was welcomed by her mother, appearing as if nothing
was wrong.
But I recalled we didn’t have that
kind of relationship. When nothing was wrong, we wouldn’t spend time together.
It never happened.
“Mother, what on earth are they…?”
My trembling voice echoed in the
silent room. It didn’t sound very reliable, even in my own ears it seemed to
echo from far away. However, the person in front of my eyes appeared to have
heard it clearly and bent her head a little while smiling softly.
Despite being a gentle gaze, it felt
uncomfortable, as if I was being observed. When I was stared at by those eyes,
I would always need to harden myself and decide on what I wanted to say.
The reason I reacted like this was
because for me, “mother” wasn’t an unconditional ally.
Since the time my first life ended, an
invisible wall had stood between my parents and me. No, I might have been the
only one who felt this.
However, it didn’t necessarily
become a problem. Since they so quickly abandoned their daughter restrained in
chains, it wasn’t surprising I could no longer believe in their love. That’s
what I personally thought. I even started doubting whether maybe, far from
love, they had any feelings at all towards me.
Even at the time the government
official read aloud the charges against me, I was alone.
Following the formal procedure, when
he asked if anyone had an objection, I remembered having shouted it was a false
charge. In that place where I had no allies, I merely repeated it again and
again. As for my father, he had given up on me a long, long time ago.
I remembered that mother came to see
me only one time. But it wasn’t to lament that her daughter had been falsely
accused, or to advocate my innocence.
She only came to make her farewell.
It happened on the day the verdict
was handed down, the day I was imprisoned.
I was put into a carriage that had
been transformed into an iron cage, ready to be carried to the dungeon where
the most sinful men among all the criminals were sequestered.
There, mother appeared alone, not
even accompanied by an attendant.
Since it had meaning as a warning
and a spectacle, the day I was imprisoned, many ordinary citizens gathered. As
they were in an excited state, no one noticed that an aristocrat woman was
standing there. She had slipped among the curious onlookers and was looking at
me.
Because I thought our eyes had met,
I hoped that maybe, she had come to save me, and I stretched out my arm through
the gap in the iron grid. My legs tied up in iron chains badly hurt, but I
couldn’t care less. I complained I was innocent, cried, screamed and shouted.
But mother quickly turned away and
left that place. Seeing her resolute and firm back that was the same as usual,
I fully realized I was forsaken.
Without any despair, without any
sadness, in fact without any emotion, she abandoned me.
When her daughter grasped the sturdy
iron grid, when she left behind her daughter who kept screaming don’t go, I wondered what mother felt?
“What are they? Simply some
medicinal tea.”
I wasn’t foolish enough to not
notice that mother’s gentle smile had deepened. She made the same expression
than a young child who had his precious toy or a hidden treasure confiscated.
However, there was no sadness or
anger in it. She had quite a strange look that was a mix of perplexity and joy.
I felt that mother’s emotions were awfully honest. Because she always conducted
herself as a perfect lady.
“… Are you aware of what is inside?”
When she picked up the bottle at her
feet, mother sighed and whispered,
“Why do you think I don’t know?
Since after all, it was made by me?”
Hearing her tone of voice that sounded
like she was thoroughly perplexed, a chill suddenly ran down my spine.
Before completely losing its light,
the sun cried. For some reason, my line-of-sight shifted to the scenery outside
the window.
Mother’s room, which had good
exposure as it was in a high location inside the mansion, was still bright even
now when the sun was setting.
When I looked at my own shadow near
my feet, at its extremity another one had drawn near.
“You are such a foolish child,
Ilya.”
Since the time I was appointed as
Soleil’s fiancée, I probably have become a stranger to her.
That’s why she wouldn’t use abusive
language or insult me, she’d play it nice just like how she did now. She never
released the sense of distance, a sort of reserve, that existed between us.
I reflexively raised my head and saw
mother whispering, “Really, such a silly child.”
A gentle and cheerful smile was
floating on her face. It looked full of affection, like always. … … that’s what
other people would have thought if they had seen it.
“… Why?”
Even though I ought to question her
directly, my voice faintly trembled and the air stayed stuck in my mouth. I was
still wavering, thinking I should not ask her, because I didn’t want to believe.
That mother... that my mother had…
“To Silvia, what on earth… did
you…?”
Each time I spited out words, it
felt like I’ve run out of oxygen. The breath I sucked up as if I was panting in
anguish produced a loud noise.
It’s wrong, it’s wrong, it’s wrong. I mustn’t ask about it. Such a thing
is impossible, someone
screamed inside my head.
“Don’t you already understand, Ilya?
What I did?”
You know, right? Mother, who was completely composed and was looking at me with calm
eyes, didn’t seem to understand her own sin. Besides, it’s hard to think that
mother… that my one and only wise mother had made a mistake of her own
initiative.
The overwhelming silence coiled
around my skin, as if it was slowly pressuring me.
My feet, which were supporting my
body about to fall, were not stepping on the soft carpet but on a rough and
undulating mass of sand. If I were to take one step forward, I would certainly
fall.
“Please, do not misunderstand, Ilya.
It’s not that I do not love that child, you see.”
It was a kind voice. Its tone didn’t
shake, yet, it sounded like a gentle and fleeting voice. It made me recall the
lullaby mother had sung, a long time ago. As she whispered so softly, the words
that fell off her lips seemed to melt and disappear in the twinkle of an eye.
The pupils gazing at me were of the
color of new green leaves that had no impurity, that had not been tarnished by
mud. It was the color I had yearned for so much in the past. Because I have
always thought that mother’s eyes were similar to the leaves overflowing with
vitality, the green leaves shining under the midsummer sun.
If my eyes hadn’t been of that dry
color of dead leaves about to fall on the ground, if they had been like
mother’s unsoiled fresh green… I would probably have been proud of my
eyes.
Nonetheless, those eyes, which
weren’t beautiful, those eyes alone were proof of the parent and child relationship
between mother and me. My faded green, and mother’s deep green.
Colors that Silvia, who had a
different mother, didn’t possess. The color that only I had inherited, mother’s
color. The amber that was spread inside them, father’s color, was also here.
Yes, it was the colors of our
parents only I, had both inherited… and yet… …
“If you truly love her, then why did
you do that? What on earth is mixed inside this? This is... these tea leaves...
what is different from normal ones? Isn’t something... something that is bad
for Silvia... mixed in it?”
If I didn’t settle this soon, Silvia
will come back home. I suddenly came to my senses and drew close to mother.
Now that I thought of it, I wondered
what happened to the maid and the servant who should have gone report to the
steward. If he was already aware of the situation, then it’s only a question of
time until it would reach father’s ears. …
… But, no one knew yet that
something was put inside the tea mother prepared for Silvia. As such, what they
would be worried about now wasn’t this.
The problem was that I had taken
something from Silvia’s room. My father, who doted on Silvia, will surely not
overlook this.
“Silvia originally had a weak
constitution. To think that inside these, something, I do not know what, is
mixed in…”
The drug I took when I was in the
brothel was for suppressing my illness and it put a burden on the body itself.
It was a very specific medicine that was still in the research phase and it
shouldn’t have appeared on the town market yet.
Although it was expensive, this
medicine I had obtained wasn’t something that only attacked the disease, it had
effects on the health of the internal organs too. Still, as it allowed me to
ward off an immediate death, I relied on it.
As for whether that medicine had
been put inside the tea mother had prepared for Silvia… I wasn’t convinced. So,
if maybe, per some chance, it was something else that had a similar scent…
“Mother, what on earth... were you...”
What on earth were you thinking? In front of mother’s smile, those words that should have closed the sentence were prevented
from being pronounced.
… … Even though I wished she would
deny it. Mother’s reaction was to overturn everything entirely.
“It is not poison.”
Instead of screaming, “then what the hell is it?” my throat was
blocked and I had to gulp down.
“So, she won’t die. That’s what worries
you, right?”
She said, as she walked towards the
dresser. As she seemed to look into the mirror, mother whispered with the same
gentle voice, “… But that child is…”
Our eyes met through the mirror.
Both reflected there, mother’s face and my face, completely looked like two
different people. That I had thought we looked alike, might only have been my
own delusion.
A dream brought forth by my wish, a meaningless dream, I thought, and my lips started to
tremble.
“That child is my precious, very
precious princess, Ilya.”
Even though she didn’t ask me to, I
nodded my head to acknowledge her remark.
Seeing this, mother said something I
quite didn’t understand, “If you knew, then why?”
I was aware this was illogical, yet
I felt like one by one, her words were heading toward the same direction.
“She should not have gone to the
academy, Ilya. That child is not good.”
“… Not good?”
“That child... that child is
hopeless.”
“…N, no! That is not true. That is
certainly not true! Silvia is... doing her best.”
I could never have imagined mother
had such a low evaluation of Silvia and I ended up unconsciously raising my
voice. For mother to have said such a thing…
But mother didn’t show any reaction
and continued to stare in the mirror.
A few minutes had passed since
earlier and the sun had continued to set, so the light flowing through the
window was weakening. Due to this, the room had become much dimmer compared to
before.
And so because of this, I couldn’t
read her expression after she had lowered her face.
“That’s not it, Ilya. You’re wrong,
it is not about that.”
Mother suddenly straightened herself
and looked over her shoulder.
“I made a promise I must fulfill. But...
my husband... because of how cute this child is…”
Falling gently, as if they were
dancing on a flower’s petals, tears overflew from mother’s eyes.
“When you suggested letting Silvia
attend the academy because it would be better for her, I should have opposed
more. But the reason I didn’t, was because I thought that my husband… would
never give his permission. And yet, that child... because Silvia solicited him
with all her might…he was moved by his affection.”
Even though I was sure he would not allow it, whispered mother as a long sigh leaked out of
her lips.
“What are you talking about?”
Mother’s eyes were swinging left and
right. She should have been looking at me, and yet, I noticed she seemed to be
gazing into something in the distance.
Such a vacant gaze was dangerous.
“… … I won’t say I didn’t intend to
do such a thing. I’m clearly aware. Of what I did, and also, of what I ought to
do. But.”
“M-mother…?”
“My husband will never forgive me.
After all, I made our princess drink such a thing.”
“Mother.”
It was like she was speaking to
herself. If you only listened to her words, you could interpret it as a
confession.
But her face didn’t show the
slightest trace of repentance. If I must describe it, her expression might have
been closer to the feeling of emptiness you would experience after everything
you accomplished or attempted to do came to an end.
“Since she started attending school,
that child became energetic. Yes, a lot livelier than before.”
Wasn’t it a good thing?
Certainly, compared to the past,
Silvia had become a lot more active. There were still moments when her
condition would worsen, but if this was the effect of the tea prepared by
mother… then she might have truly become energetic and healthy.
That child was doing her best to
continue to attend the academy.
“But that’s not good, then. This
situation... that child must be hopeless. It mustn’t become like this.”
After saying this in a whispering
voice, mother abruptly grasped the air with her right hand.
Because of this sudden gesture, for
a second, I put myself on guard and from the edge of my field of vision, I
caught a glimpse of a flitting silver color.
But I was unable to react and stood
still.
My lips did move to try and say
something like, Don’t or Wait, but they made no sound.
The words inside my mouth, which
lost their place to go, were brought to a standstill and blocked my throat.
I only blinked once, but taking
advantage of that gap, a black lump flew off with a frightening momentum.
My eyes moved to follow it, but
because it was too far away, they couldn’t catch up.
Something felt on my cheek.
I thought a fly had landed on it. I
reflexively touched it with my right hand and felt something with my fingers.
While I knitted my brows because I
felt something lukewarm, when I moved my line of sight to confirm what it was,
mother’s delicate body fell with a thud.
Ah, right. More important than what’s
on my cheek, what happened to mother……?
I couldn’t comprehend what happened.
Even though my eyes had certainly seen it all.
My line of sight moved to mother’s fallen
body, then once again, I looked at my own hand.
As I looked alternatively at my
fingers dyed in red and at mother’s unmoving body, my feet stepped forth. But
the bottom of my feet didn’t transmit any feeling. As if the ground had
collapsed and I had fallen in a hole, as if in one instant, I had lost sight of
the place where I was.
Because my field of vision was
trembling greatly, I thought the mansion was crumbling down.
While telling myself it couldn’t be
the case, I strongly closed my eyes, and I opened them once again. Then I
looked around to confirm the state of the walls and the ceiling, and realized
nothing had happened to the estate itself.
Just after that, I understood it was
myself who was falling.
Even though I wasn’t injured...
something... was strange.
“… M-mother…?” While supporting my
body with both hands, I crawled and approached mother who was lying on the
extravagant woven carpet.
In deep crimson and pale orange,
flowers of various sizes were blooming on it. These complex patterns were suitable
to ornate the feet of nobles.
Mother’s blood was quickly dying it
entirely.
“Mo…ther”
My breathing accelerated; I couldn’t
inhale well. So it was obvious I could not exhale properly and a dry voice leaked
out of my mouth.
What should I do at a time like this? I thought, but my legs refused to move and I
couldn’t stand up. Using my elbows, I continued to advance forward on the
carpet.
My sleeves coiled around my body and
weighed me down, it was a big hindrance, and my body, that had become heavy
like lead, refused to move like I wanted. But my mind was rushing me to hurry.
“…W-why… did you do… why do that…
mother…”
While she tightly grasped the knife
she had slit her own neck with, mother stared at me with a dispirited gaze.
I didn’t know if she was still
conscious or not. From her neck, blood continued to flow out without
stopping.
Desperate, I finally reached
mother’s side and pressed down on her neck. But my hands couldn’t stop the
blood, the red liquid was still leaking out of my fingers.
At that moment, mother’s thin
fingers moved without strength and seized my wrist. I thought she only wanted
me to stay by her side, but I strongly repressed this feeling.
When I faltered for a second,
“I’m so-rry, Ilya…”
The green eyes on which a shadow had
fallen, were fixed on my face.
“…Sorry… Ilya……”
After having uttered so in a relaxed
tone like she was talking to a friend, she strongly grasped my wrist.
“Pull yourself together, mother,
everything is going to be alright.”
Like I did when I was a child, I
kept repeating, it’s alright, it’s going
to be alright.
“Mother, mother, it’s fine, you’ll
be fine, so.”
Even though I knew nothing was fine
at all, yet, I could only say those words.
Looking at my imploring expression,
mother’s eyes opened wide in surprise. And then, still making that astonished
expression, she heaved one long sigh.
“Mother?”
Her pupils were opened and their light
was rapidly scattering.
“…Mother, mother… m-mother, mother…”
No, stop, what, why.
“No, no, no… That, that, I don’t
want… someone.”
Mother’s hand that was grasping my
arm fell on the carpet.
With my hand that had become free, I
pressed down on the wound that had worsened compared to before, but it was
useless.
I thought I should press down with
some cloth, but there was nothing nearby and I couldn’t loosen my hands.
“Someone, anyone, come, someone!”
Even though I wanted to scream, my
breathing stopped and the words didn’t form.
I was useless. Irremediably useless.
Even at a time like this, I couldn’t
do anything, not even raise my voice and shout out for help.
“Mother! Mother!”
I called out to her, but there
already wasn’t any response.
Her hollow eyes, which had
completely lost their light, weren’t reflecting anything.
“… … Come back, don’t go… please…
mother…! Not again… don’t… leave me behind again…”
No, in such a place, don’t leave me in such a place.
In the gaps between my disordered
breathing, I supplicated her, but mother was no longer seeing me.
Like always, she would not look
back.
Nocta’s thoughts:
Everyone, are you satisfied to see Ilya’s mother die? In front of Ilya? By slitting her throat?
I don’t know what’ll happen next, but I bet someone is gonna be traumatized. Again.
Thank you for the translation ...that was such a surprise.. I thought maybe mother will kill Ilya never thought she'll slit her own throat.. This never happened in previous lives.. I hope this helps turn the events for good.. Hope ilya finds good ending
ReplyDelete......T^T
DeleteI was expecting that she would maybe end up suiciding again or otherwise dying maybe even give up at some point and try to tell Silvia to not drink the tea herself but never would I have expected this! Nocta how on earth can you stop after this chapter and not immediately jump into the next one? I don't want to spoil myself the good translation by reading the raw right now (how sneaky hahaha)!
ReplyDeleteI wonder than the mother started to kill of her emotions. Did she so just recently with Siliva's case or from way before? Was Silivia's case maybe just the one that pushed her over the edge or did she really never feel for her own daughter? I kinda get the feeling that she was surprised that Ilya actually worried that much about her. Maybe she thought the Ilya would, rightfully so, hate her by now and that was what the suddenly wide open eyes meant.
I'm pretty sure that the father the majority of servants and the father are going to blame Ilya for her mothers death but are going to try to hush up everything so that the family name and maybe the marquise house don't suffer. What is going to happen out of her engagement now? I still think that Ilya is going to die in the next few chapters. I don't know why but I have a feeling that the father wont act out in the near future either but is going to hush everything up while looking at Ilya with even colder eyes than before. Good thing that I have exams coming up I wont be checking for updates a dozen times a day
I don't know how true it is but I often hear that many mothers suffer for years to come silently after abandoning or aborting their child. I have a few theories for why she did that in the first place so I can't think of her as purely evil and can partly understand her but I still should have been happy about this development! But how can I bee with how desperate Ilya is!
DeleteHow cold I stop here? I don't remember... I must have been possessed by an evil spirit!
DeleteI don't know if her mother loved her or not, but she talked about a promise, so maybe there is a reason behind Silvia's poisoning. I can't guess what could possibly justify this, but we'll see.
Good luck with your exams! The next chapter will be up on Sunday or Monday, so no need to check so frequently!
What...just happened?!?!???
ReplyDeleteUnreliable narrator is one thing, Ilya had been damaged by her countless rebirths. Mental trauma is expected.
But that Mother? ?!!??
Anyway, thank you for the chapter!
Someone's spoiler set me on this novel and the next chapter will be as surprising and vexing for our dear Illya.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if mother is also possessed by some other force and only at the moment of death was she able to take control and seize her daughter's hand.
Someone's spoiler set me on this novel and the next chapter will be as surprising and vexing for our dear Illya.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if mother is also possessed by some other force and only at the moment of death was she able to take control and seize her daughter's hand.
-_- Flipped table. Don't like the mother. Never do never will. How can she not love her own flesh of blood? I can understand if Ilya was raised by other family and returned to her later. The love might be zilch. But Ilya has been raised by her parents from baby. The Dad is a lost cause because of true love. Don't tell me that mommy dearest is also in love with Silvia's mother.
ReplyDeleteshe might be compelled by the same 'force'? that acts upon Soilel? and she trying to poison Silvia is her way of trying to defy it, perhaps she trying to kill her is easier than trying to show love for Ilya, as much fucked up that is
DeleteAnother theory would be that the mother never actually wanted Ilya and had been forced to. I remember the parents having a good relationship but that shouldn't have always been the case. From chapter 25 we also know that the father loved not only another woman but that he also was the protagonist of that book and that he dearly loved Siliva's mother. Maybe Ilya was therefore solely born out of obligation towards her husband whom never had eyes for her nor do we even know if she loved him back then either. Ilya also does describe her as not heartless so she shouldn't be a bad person in and of itself (I still hate her though). Maybe this is an extreme case of the mother trying to distance herself from her "duty" and feelings and her therefore distances herself from and forsakes her own daughter. This might be completly different but once in a while you will hear from mothers hating their own children due to "forcing" them into a life they didn't want (mostly in stories). I think that her suddenly open eyes show that she was aware of her bad treatment towards Ilya and thought that she was hatted by her. Take this with a grain of salt as a part of this is simply wish fulfillment. Oh and I still hate her
DeleteWe'll surely know more about this in the following chapters, but she mentioned a promise, so she must have had a reason to act like this. Well, I don't like her either anyway
Deletekinda stupid why the 'world'? would want someone to suffer so much as Ilya, on a side note I find quite surprising she is still not resenting anyone, even though they might not be at fault here, she needs to learn that recognition of others is not so important but at the same time she is not a normal person she is still part of the high society so she needs to keep up with the appearances and I think that is the most depressing part of this story, if she could just throw everything through the window and don't give a damn about the world I would be really happy for her
ReplyDeleteMaybe, she is so regretful of her past self who fought with every women for Soleil that now she doesn't dare blaming others? Who knows
Deletethis comment has no relation about the chapter its just me ranting
ReplyDeletethe little sister is so bitchy, seriously, I don't get her is she trying to make Ilya suffer or is she just extremely clueless about the things that she does?
like you don't need to be smart to realize that she shouldn't stay so much with your sister fiancee she should at least had received some kind of education regarding relationship between the sexes in high society
another thought that came up, why the father didn't cancel the engagement and tried to set up Silvia as the fiancee, by what we saw so far no one seems to like Ilya(hell I wouldn't be surprised if the parents of the guy would rather have Silvia morry their son than Ilya), so changing who is going to marry shouldn't have been much of a problem
DeleteI also doubt that Sylvia is really pure and innocent. She might have been at the beginning because she hadn't interacted much with the outside world but the academy should have opened her eyes.
DeleteFor the father, it's only a "if", but imagine he reported his love for Silvia's mother to Silvia? Then he wouldn't want to marry her, unless forced, like it was the case when Ilya run away and Soleil's family pressured him to give Silvia in exchange.
Lastly, Soleil's parents probably prefer Ilya to Silvia (it's only my opinion). Because Ilya has been educated since birth and is able to manage the marquis'household, which, as I recall, is also in charge of all the black and dark jobs for the kingdom, like spying and assassination. Someone pure and naive like Silvia wouldn't work as the marquis'wife.
Omfg. Im. Shook.
ReplyDeleteI wish I could leave long and useful coments like above but man. Im reeling.
I did see a spoiler that she would kill herself in front of Ilya... but I... still never expected this.
(Also in the last chapter I thought the mother came to Ilya’s room, but really Ilya went to her mother huh...)
I have a feeling that people will try to make it seem like Ilya murdered her, or *solely* drove her to suicide...
Man...
Thank you for the chapter!!
though I find it quite possible they might not because it would be a huge problem for them to solve it so they might just shove it under the rug on the other hand, her father might want to use this chance to get rid of Ilya(by so far it seems like he dislikes her if not hates her) so he accuses her and make Silvia marry the guy(I totally forgot about his name and I am too lazy and not willingly because I hate him to search for it)
DeleteWe'll see, we'll see. But even if her father accuses her, I don't think Silvia or Al would believe it. But can they change the situation?
DeleteMan... I relate so hard to having an abusive mom but still wanting her affection and still being unable to oppose her.
ReplyDeleteI hope it's not too hard on you. Cheer up :)
DeleteAltogether, the mother seems...off. More like she's following a self given script than actually feeling it. She puts people into a role or niche, and bases her actions towards that person in such a way. Silvia is the sickly one, the one that stays at home due to constant illness. So when she not only starts leaving the house but also steadily getting better, the mother poisons her in order to make her need to be bedridden at home. Ilya is the one that's self reliant, that doesn't need to be worried about. Her nearly drowning jeopardized that, so the mother's comment of “Having to worry about only that child is enough.” was more of a reminder or obvious statement than anything to her. Might also explain the iron cage, with the mother following the general script of being within physical proximity, yet so emotionally distant that there is no way she could be relied on or develop a connection. The mother's near emotionless suicide could be a pre-thought out course of action of what would she naturally do in the case that she was caught. Of course, I could be utterly wrong about it all, since there hasn't been an interlude with a pov of the mother yet, and she just really dislikes Ilya.
ReplyDeleteFor my part, I wonder why she didn't like Ilya. There must have been a reason, a trigger. She said she promised, but what? To who? Silvia's mother?
DeleteOh god stopping at this chapter is just cruel.
ReplyDeleteI'm not even sure what to think of the mother at this point, this was way to outside expectations.
Poor Ilya, she'll be blamed for her mother's death for sure.
Wow is good to be back with my ex again, thank you Dr Ekpen for the help, I just want to let you know that is reading this post in case you are having issues with your lover and is leading to divorce and you don’t want the divorce, Dr Ekpen is the answer to your problem. Or you are already divorce and you still want him/her contact Dr Ekpen the spell caster now on (ekpentemple@gmail.com) or whatsapp him on +2347050270218 and you will be clad you did
ReplyDeleteSo what if they'll blame Ilya for 'killing' her mother?
ReplyDeleteI'm sick of it. I'm sick of every idiotic people pointing their fingers for Ilya.
So the main culprit is the sperm donor aka. shit earl. He fell in love with the princess of another country and was weak enough to not do something to be able to marry her, but he still got her pregnant and she gave him her child (Sylvia.)
ReplyDeleteWomb was probably in love with sperm donor and hated the princess, so she was set on killing Sylvia.
Then sperm donor made Illya be the fiance of shit Marquis' son, who was basically sperm donor in his younger days. Shit son fell in love with Sylvia, but was weak enough, that he didn't try to marry her and now Illya is suffering for eternity.
Basically her father doomed his family due to being a weak piece of shit. I'm not saying that only the father is at fault, but he seems to be the cause. The rest are still pieces of shit (Sylvia included, Illya excluded) but the father is the biggest piece of shit of them all :D
Pq ela sempre perde o controle do próprio corpo? Pq ela é tão fraca?
ReplyDeleteMan, it's like there's a huge competition called "Who Can Give Illya The Greatest Trauma" and everyone is just DYING to grab the winner's spot lol.
ReplyDeleteOh THE HELL? No way, what? I think Illya is going to die in this life again, but... I dont know, I think there are a lot of interesting things happenning this time, so she may live. It would be quite boring to go back once again to that tea party with all that is happening right now. Anyhow, I AM STILL WATING FOR CROW
ReplyDeletecrow , where the hec- either ways i still dont understand why ilyas mother would do that
ReplyDeletewhatthefuck. WHAT THE FUCK!!!! Huh?!? What kind of mother did that to her child and hsbvfuennaka;;;₫+#(*?.
ReplyDelete